Doing youtube videos once a week is fun including editing the video as well as the editing of the thumbnail. But trying to squeeze a video for every single day for vlogmas is a little hard. To be honest i wanted to take on this challenge because it’s the christmas season and my birthday is coming soon. I wanted to make it as meaningful as possible, sometimes its hard to keep up with life because I’m so busy with school projects, homework and work.

Going to school is hard enough but its worse when you gotta do group projects as well as working. Like I’m so used to being at home and doing things at my own speed. Which sometimes sucks but still. I wished I wasn’t at home all the time. The reason most of my vlogmas videos are of me cooking or being at home is because it’s really hard when I want to go out and do a Vlog. People will stare at you and think something is wrong with you why am I videoing with headphones on.

Also my friends. Not all of them agree that I should be doing this. Some of them don’t even know that I do YouTube videos. It’s like the debate of why you put your life out there and why you don’t talk about many things. Sometimes some things I would share with different friends, sometimes I just message my korean teacher and she says that it makes no difference either way I do things. As long as it makes you happy it’s best.

Sometimes in school I just wanna not talk in class but when you have classmates that never even answer the teachers questions my teachers automatically pick between me and 5 other classmates because we always answer. It’s like when teachers pick that one person all the time and its always me. Fact is i love school when the teachers are really nice but if the teachers like screaming at everyone in class i dont bother caring much about what the teacher teaches. I usually just read everything that’s online and ask my classmates.

Now the worst part of all is when you have friends and “friends” that actually want to meet you to talk about life or anything in general. To be honest, some of my friends like to say things that don’t exactly make you feel good about yourself but still we are just friends. To those friends that i mean “friends” yeah they are those friends that make plans with you and just bail out because they are busy doing something else or have a sudden “oh i have work” situation. For me when i meet with my friends, I don’t want to keep hearing about them complaining about everything. I just want to talk to them about regular stuff not about them bombarding me about their stuff.

Vlogmas is also kinda like I’m vlogging everyday and I have to edit everyday so it throws my life schedule off but good for me I have school holidays so I don’t actually “die” from overworking myself. Which actually is why I go to the gym less nowadays because I’m just tired.

Social life, it’s hard because I’m an ambivert and people think oh why am I not talking or smiling at them as oh I’m not happy or I’m mad at something which actually is not because I don’t really smile on command. Like I kinda wish people wouldn’t think that being on YouTube or having a YouTube channel would make someone be an extrovert because I’m not. I am 100% a homebody I don’t like talking in public. I don’t like being put on the spot because it freaks me out and I stutter. Especially when I’m outside trying to order something to eat at like Let’s just say McDonald’s and people behind me are like waiting for 2-5 minutes and just not happy after standing behind me because I take forever to find my change or give an order. It’s hard because when I’m recording it’s just me and my phone or my laptop. Some people just don’t get it and others actually know what I mean and they already get it.

It’s hard trying to juggle everything. But I like it, so I’m going to keep doing it.

Happy New Year everyone 🙂